The US government has a new website, www.ready.gov, which uses public service symbols for terrorism readiness much in the way the nuclear fallout campaigns did after WWII.  But these pictures are so ambiguous they could mean anything.  So we've prepared a few educated guesses about what they could be saying.

If a terrorist sets you on fire, don't dance the runningman dance.  Sit and let the fire slowly burn your back hair off. 

If a door gets in your way, break it down with your shoulder.

If you can't break the door down with your shoulder, karate chop it in three places. 

If a terrorist sprays your crotch with a toxic vapor, think about how badly it might hurt you instead of leaving the area.

If the pain gets really bad, blow your terrorist whistle.  If you are bald, just yell - the sound will bounce off of your nose.

If you hear Arabic music blasting, you are under an auditory attack and should either curl yourself in a ball and cry in the corner until it is over or run like you're caught in an L.A. race riot.  

If you come across dead birds and fish in the middle of a toxic hurricane, take time to marvel at the novelty in this.